BY HANK REICHMAN

Despite the presence of the verb “ban” in my headline, this post does not uncover yet another censorious outrage committed by a university administration — well, at least not a very major one.  Still, a recent decision by the administration of Columbia University to prohibit its university marching band from performing at athletic events merits recognition, if only for its petty narrow-mindedness (and because I’m a Columbia alum, who as a student over 50 years ago took great pleasure in the band’s antics).

The Columbia band is not and, since at least the 1950s, has never been a traditional marching band.  It’s small and trades largely in satire and humor.  Its website promotes it as “the cleverest band in the world,” with the slogan, “If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the band.”  The band often makes phallic-shaped marching formations and has been known to cheer the opposite team at games.  In 1970, at a game at West Point, the band took a formation they called “burning Cambodian village.”  They’ve used non-traditional instruments that include a toilet seat, empty buckets, and wet floor caution signs.  They played CeeLo Green’s “Fuck You” outside Trump Tower in 2016.  (For a quick survey of the band’s history — it was founded in 1904 — go here.)

Such antics have often provided welcome relief at the school’s football games, where Columbia’s performance has been nothing short of epically bad.  In 1988 the team ended a 44-game losing streak dating back to 1983, at the time an NCAA record.  After that the Lions reeled off 24 consecutive losing seasons; in 2016 a 24-game losing streak came to an end.  I can well remember one contest from my freshman year in 1965 when Columbia played Brown, with whom we were battling to stay out of the Ivy League cellar.  The score: Brown 47, Columbia 0.  And at the time my classmate and future NFL quarterback Marty Domres (he would replace the great Johnny Unitas on the Baltimore Colts) was on the field!

So, the band has long been a source of levity and entertainment, albeit not without generating controversy.  For instance, starting in the 1990s the band came under some valid criticism for the sexism and even misogyny of some of its snark.  But one apparently recent tradition has caused the most trouble. That’s “Orgo Night.”  According to the New York Times, since the 1970s “band members would arrive in Room 209 of Butler Library to play loudly and perform a short comedy routine, much of which was aimed at satirizing inane campus policies and ineffective administrators.  The semiannual event, known as Orgo Night (so named because it was held right before organic chemistry exams), was meant to signal to the world that Columbia was a place of occasional levity — that the student experience went beyond the toil and grind.”  In 2015, some chemistry students, backed by a library administrator, complained and the administration shut down the practice.  However, in 2017 and 2018 the rebellious band reinstated the tradition.  Here’s a video of the event:

This was all meant in a spirit of fun, but as the Times reported, “The skits took aim at Brett Kavanaugh, campus housing, Columbia’s slow-to-change core curriculum and Ivy League admissions (‘we should just abolish affirmative action for white people, better known as: athletic recruitment, legacy admissions, and Midwestern representation’) among other subjects.”

In October 2018, the band was informed that a large portion of its budget, specifically funding from Columbia College and Columbia Engineering, would be cut starting this academic year, a decision that many band members believed to be a punishment for Orgo Night.   Administrators also told the band last fall that their funding from Athletics would also be removed if they failed to become a recognized student group.  With all three of its funding sources eliminated, the band was informed — three days before the start of the football season — that it would no longer be welcome at games and, moreover, that, according to the Columbia Spectator, “any individuals who brought instruments to games would be in violation of Ivy League regulations and put under individual sanctions subject to Dean’s Discipline.”

In an email to band members the group’s current student manager wrote that the Columbia University Marching Band “will no longer exist in any official capacity” and that its board is “weighing all possible options.”  “But the band will not disappear,” he added.  “We’ll still be here, just not at the football stadium.  The show must go on, the band will continue to play.”

Here is what the band’s board wrote in a September 25 official statement:

At 2:00 PM today, Band leadership met with the Athletics Director, Peter Pilling; Associate Athletics Director, Bob Steitz; and Executive Director of Student Engagement, William Lucas. As opposed to discussing the upcoming football season, the Band was told that because we are not recognized by Undergraduate Student Life (USL) or a governing board, the Athletic Department would be pulling all funding from the organization, as Athletics is unable and unwilling to provide the necessary oversight and structure. This decision was made over the summer without any dialogue with the Board.

Last year, the Band was directed to join a governing board by USL. After missing the Spring 2019 deadline, we have been actively pursuing recognition from the Activities Board at Columbia (ABC) in their Fall 2019 application cycle. Both Athletics and USL were aware of this fact when the announcement was made, and both Athletics and our advisor saw or were otherwise aware of our submitted application.

Rather than give us time to rectify our error, the Band has lost all additional funding and is prohibited from performing at all Athletics events for the foreseeable future. Outside entertainment has been booked for the remainder of the calendar year; any individuals who attempt to play instruments or disrupt Athletics activities will be in violation of Ivy League regulations and subject to individual sanctioning under Dean’s Discipline.

Most importantly, should we be recognized by ABC this application cycle, the Band will still be prohibited from playing at all athletic functions under threat of individual disciplinary sanctions. From their plans for a replacement group, which were formulated months before our notification of this decision, it is evident that Athletics and USL are not concerned with whether the Columbia University Marching Band is recognized. Instead, they are doing everything in their power to ensure the organization no longer exists.

The Athletics Department will be seeking to create a new spirit organization overseen by a faculty director.  According to Athletics, those who wish to join this band will have to audition. The Band’s mission has been to create an inclusive organization that welcomes everyone regardless of income, identity, or musical ability.  We are currently the only campus musical organization that does not require members to audition or interview to join.

As of the current moment, the Columbia University Marching Band will no longer exist in an official capacity. The Board is weighing all possible options and would appreciate any support the community can offer. The Band has been bringing school spirit to this campus for over a century, and we want to continue in that mission.

The show, as always, must go on.

As if to add insult to injury, at the first home football game this year, the Columbia band was replaced by a high school band from Staten Island.

As both an alum and an advocate for student rights, I vigorously protest!